Putting the OH!? In Orgasm
By Sexpress Editor Sofia Tinné
Orgasms, which are frequently regarded as the height of sexual pleasure, are intricate, enigmatic, and very private sensations. They are frequently obscured by society expectations, myths, and inaccuracies. Let's examine the differences between men and women, such as reasons as to why some women fake their orgasms, and why communication and honesty should always take the lead during sexual intimacy.
Men usually experience orgasms through ejaculation; however, women have a more intricate journey to reach climax. Some women need both vaginal and clitoral stimulation to orgasm, which typically means their sexual experience becomes more varied and complex. Studies have shown that a substantial percentage of women struggle to finish during sexual encounters; the many reasons being, anxiety, depression, and stress. Societal pressure is also a large factor within this topic, many feel obligated to please their partner and be okay with not reaching climax, while others are simply not ready to have sex, but society has taught them that virginity is a bad thing and that you will be more “popular” if you have sex.
The expectations society has of women's sexual performance are frequently unreal. This pressure to not let a partner down may induce some women to stage orgasms. Many misunderstandings, such as difficulty to explain sexual differences and preferences can also lead to faking climax, rather than addressing certain issues within the dynamic. In some cases, women may fake it to protect the other person's ego, but why should it affect them? With open and honest communication, you can tell each other what to do so you both can reach the finish line, otherwise simply telling someone you cannot or do not want to orgasm is also perfectly fine.
The Dangers of Dishonesty:
Over time, the accumulation of dishonesty and unspoken sexual desires can really hinder your relationship as a whole. It can cause your relationship to be unsatisfactory and feel strained. There is also an element of self-depreciation when it comes to faking an orgasm, as it denies people the opportunity to really explore and enjoy their own bodies and fully understand their own sexual experience. In TIME Magazine, research suggested that a large 80 per cent of women fake an orgasm during sexual intercourse. Within the magazine there are many suggested reasons as to why people think women fake climax. One reason being, that women will fake an orgasm to elevate their arousal to finally actually be able to reach the finish line. Others proposed that women will fake an orgasm to end the sex all together and get it over with.
Comfort Crowd:
Many women are less likely to orgasm during a hookup or one night stand. Due to the comfort levels of each person, there are many small situations like this that can either make or break the outcome of your sexual experience. When you know someone and are comfortable and safe with them, then you’re more likely to let loose and not feel ashamed of your orgasm (Not that you should be ashamed either way) When being intimate with someone you’re comfortable with, you can communicate your turn ons/offs and be selfish sometimes to ensure you reach your climax.
Feet are also a big factor in the orgasm that not many people know (And no, I don’t mean the kink) when keeping your feet warm, with either socks or a foot rub, it can help stimulate arousal and elevate sexual experience. This is all due to improved blood flow. Warmth dilates blood vessels, increasing blood flow to all regions of the body, including the genital region. This increased circulation may contribute to increased sensitivity and arousal seeing as comfort and relaxation are frequently connected with warmth. Warm feet can help relax your entire body, including your muscles and thoughts. Reduced tension and stress might make reaching a level of arousal and orgasm simpler. Then there is the psychological aspect: The link between warmth and relaxation might have a psychological impact on you. Feeling cosy and comfy might put you in a good mood. Making it simpler to concentrate on pleasure and intimacy.
While warm feet may contribute to a more calm and comfortable sexual experience for certain people, the factors influencing orgasm are very unique and complex. There is no one-size-fits-all orgasmic recipe, and what works for one individual may not work for another. Communication and understanding between couples are essential for determining what factors contribute to increased pleasure and satisfaction during intimate moments.
The Industry:
There are many different sex industries in the twenty-first century, such as Onlyfans, Pornhub and many other platforms where you can share, sell, buy, and watch sexual content, which I will dedicate another article to but for right now, my main concern is how women portray their sexual experience in these pornographic videos. Many young and impressionable teens may want to explore their own sexuality and by doing that, end up finding many videos and photos online. By watching this type of content at a young age when you are not yet sexually active can hinder your perspective on what sex is really supposed to be like. It creates unrealistic expectations for people due to the fact that the adult industry is all about the camera, the sexual positions are aimed to give the ‘best view’ and the angles are all staged. The fact that most of these people are actors is something that is not known to many, so people end up going into their sexual experience with heightened expectations and may come out disappointed. It can also pressure people into thinking sex should be like it is in the movies/adult industry, which will force people to create a facade and not truly enjoy sex the way it is meant to be enjoyed. For women who watch porn, seeing actresses fake orgasms can have a negative impact on their self-esteem and body image. They may compare themselves to the performances and feel inferior if they are unable to replicate what they see on film.
It is critical to understand that not all pornography is the same, and that there is a broad variety of content available. Some producers and performers place priority on authentic depictions of sexual experiences, emphasising consent, communication, and mutual enjoyment. Many mainstream pornographic materials, on the other hand, might propagate unrealistic and harmful preconceptions.
Finishing Off:
Orgasms should never be a performance that you have to put on but instead a genuine shared experience. By grasping honest communication, breaking down societal norms and taboos, and of course, prioritising mutual pleasure you can create a fulfilling and satisfying sexual journey for the people involved. Fake orgasms should be abandoned in favour of sincerity, connection, and the pursuit of actual sexual empowerment. Although it is occasionally done with good intentions, faking orgasms ultimately limits genuine connection and openness in relationships. It is critical to remember that having a real and open conversation about one's wishes, preferences, and requirements in the bedroom is critical for creating trust and ensuring both partners have pleasant sexual experiences. Faking orgasms not only promotes myths about pleasure, but it also stops people from actually bonding with their partners on a deeper level. In summary, embracing honesty and vulnerability can pave the way for more meaningful and real experiences for everyone involved.
